i don't want to lose you
by aafiqahsha
Summary: jasper on new years's eve. recalling back over his year. my first story, be nice. J/A. E/B. Em/R.


Jasper looked out the window of his office. The sun was setting. Splashes of pink, red and crimson were splattered all across into the horizon. He put down the book that he was reading on his table and faced the open window. The wind was blowing gently, rustling his curly hair. He let the wind blew over him, somehow, it had the ability to calm him. He played over the events that had happened today, and the past year. It was the 31st of December already. My, does time flies quick.

He smiled at the thought of the new family he had gained this year, his new sister-in-law, the sweet, clumsy, Bella, and his beautiful, smart and adorable niece, Nessie. He was glad that Edward finally has someone to share the rest of his life with. After the Volturri incident, Edward has been a wonderful father. It was hard for him to let go of Nessie. Edward wasn't so pleased about letting go of his daughter, especially not to the mongrel. But he knew Nessie was for all of them to share.

He remembered the few days after the Volturri incident. Esme was always making up excuses to ask Alice and Jasper to help around at the house, just making sure that they won't suddenly leave again. She would sometimes walk by their room on purpose just to confirm that the two of them were still at home.

"Esme, you don't have to check on us every two hours. We won't leave, I can promise you that…" Jasper once said smilingly, when he caught Esme peeking over at the door frame while he was reading a book.

"I'm sorry but, I just can't help it. I'm worried that I'll lose the two of you again.…" she replied sadly, as waves of anguish swept across him as she thought about the days when Alice and him were gone tracking the half breed.

Jasper went over to his mother and gave her a hug. He muttered to her, "We will never leave you, mom. Never again…" and with that, the emotion Esme was feeling suddenly disappeared and was now replaced with calm and happiness. She never checked on the two of them again. Well, at least, not every two hours.

The sun finally set and the sky was once again dark. Another day has gone, and in a few hours time, another year will be gone. Jasper has never told anyone but sometimes he ever wondered about the after life. He would never know now, would he, being immortal and all. He wondered what it would feel like if he was reborn. Would his life still be same or would it be completely different. He also wondered what life would be like if he wasn't changed to a vampire. Not that it was his choice to be one. Would he ever love someone as much as he loved his Alice? Would he ever gotten married? And to who? Would he have a happy loving family that he, technically, have right now?

How is would feel like to age? How would it feel like to die? He was never afraid of death. He literally stared it right in the face and challenged it. Oh, he loved it when he was fighting in the war. Until now, he still holds the grudge over the south losing. But he knows he can't do anything about that now, can he? It's all in the past. His past.

His past.

He held his two hands in front of him. There it was, his past all marked almost on every inch of his body. He has lost count of how many scars he has. Emmett, too, gave up trying to count them when he volunteered to count the scars Jasper have after he got that new scar protecting his love in the fight against the newborns and Victoria. He traced his fingers to one particular scar. It was still painful, but the thought that he prevented the filthy newborn from hurting his Alice was strong enough for the venom to be as painless as water touching his skin.

He traced his fingers to the other scars on his arm, flinching every time as the memories run by his head again.

Suddenly, this wave of happiness crashed over him. He turned around on impulse and what stood in front of him was the face of his future. He was finding it hard to breathe somehow as he gazed upon the beauty that is his wife. He realized now that his past doesn't matter, as long as he has Alice with him, nothing else matters. She had a huge grin of her face. Seeing that smile on that face, if he has a heart, it would definitely beat out of control. He replied his lover's smile.

She flitted across the room to sit on his lap in no later than a second. She looked so tiny compare to him. He wrapped himself around her, as she rested her head to his muscular chest.

"It's almost midnight…" she whispered quietly, "I came for my midnight kiss…"

"5… 4…3…" Emmett's loud voice beamed from downstairs, Nessie's laugh also can be heard, "2… 1… HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!! Come here, Rose…"

A loud crash was heard, followed by shrieks by Esme and Bella.

"My couch!!" Esme sounded mad.

"Emmett!! Nessie's in the same room as you!!!" Bella's voice in distress.

Jasper ignored the chaos downstairs and stared lovingly to his wife's eyes.

"Happy new year, Alice. I love you…" he said quietly as their lips danced around each others'.


End file.
